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This all looks wildly complicated, but what you're looking at is the Sundem/Tierney Unified Celebrity Theory, a collaboration between formula-happy Garth Sundem and Times op-ed loverboy John Tierney. The equation is designed to predict the odds that a given celebrity marriage will last; according to the STUCT, Renee Zellwegger and Kenny Chesney didn't stand much of a chance, while Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have maybe a 10% likelihood of lasting a year (if they ever get married, that is). As for Britney and Kevin? 0% chance that they'll make it to the five-year mark.

And for this, you paid $49.95.

From Tinseltown to Splitsville: Just Do the Math [NYT (sub. req'd)]