Hollywood Out Of Ideas, Cyborgs With Feathered Hair Edition: 'Bionic Woman' Rebuilt

Today's Variety reports that somewhere within NBC, a development executive desperate for the kinds of groundbreaking ideas that might one day lift his network out of the Nielsen sub-basement has instead retreated to the half-remembered shows of his childhood, committing to a script for a potential Bionic Woman series. (For those who don't remember the original, late 70s spinoff, it was the story of a woman who had certain body parts enhanced or replaced by bionic technology so that she could better crush tennis balls with her bare hand and withstand the physical rigors of intimate encounters with her similarly semi-robotic boyfriend, the Six Million Dollar Man.) Executive producer David Eick, who recently revived Battlestar Galactica for the Sci-Fi Channel, promises to completely rebuild his Bionic Woman, not merely drag Lindsay Wagner out of storage and oil up her robotic joints:

Instead of focusing on terrorism and militarism, the new "Bionic" will explore the role of professional women in contemporary society and how they juggle their various roles.

"It's using the idea of artificial technology as a metaphor for what contemporary women sometimes feel is necessary to do everything that needs to be done," Eick said. .

It's difficult not to try to work backward to the pitch based on the soundbites Eick gave Var; we can almost hear him excitedly describing his "reconceptualization" as Bionic Soccer Mom, or, and please forgive us for even going here, "Desperate Housewives, but if Felicity Huffman had super-hearing and two robotic arms."