I've kept my mouth shut for the past two weeks, sluggishly phoning in my twelve daily items ever since I first gave notice (the extra not-funny ones? Those were me). But now it's my last day after two years of this ridiculousness, the last time I will wake up at sunrise so that I might get a leg up on Jann Wenner's sly move to bring Rolling Stone to the studly orgy that is Rio. Well, no more of that. Go be gay, Jann. I care not. In fact, I'm happy for you. I'm a happy person right now. I don't even want to stab Ann Curry!

So what to do with my last day atop this nifty little soapbox? If you've got inane or asinine post ideas, I'm seriously open to suggestions. In the meantime, let's start with a random cat picture.

It's My Last Ever First Post of the Day!


Yeah, that felt good.
—Jessica