Anderson Cooper's 360 Degrees of Hotness: The Breakdown

Just what is it about CNN anchor Anderson Cooper? Is it the steely gaze? The mysterious CIA connection? The penchant for hot young Latinos? No, Anderson Cooper cannot be contained merely by a rote taxonomy of his many virtues, but nevertheless, we've never met a man you couldn't properly encapsulate in a good, solid pie chart. Plus, it ties in quite neatly to the whole "360 degrees" concept, don't you agree? After the jump, Intern Mary plows through just this past year's worth of Anderson Cooper media mentions, classifying each attempt to distill and articulate the fundamental Cooperian appeal.

Explaining Anderson Cooper's Media Appeal, 2006 Year-to-Date
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Anderson Cooper's 360 Degrees of Hotness: The BreakdownWe're pleased to note that Anderson's ambiguous sexual charisma is at least as important as his education, but somewhat surprised that the lead point of reference is not his blue eyes, but his blue blood. Though it's a fine thing that his ability as a journalist ranks near the bottom of the pile, since the actual journalism can safely be left to the network's tough bald bastard.

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