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In today's episode: Owen "The Butterscotch Stallion" Wilson; Jake Gyllenhaal; Heath Ledger; Morrissey; Neil Patrick Harris; Isaiah Washington; Adam Brody; Andy Dick; Damon Wayans and Gavin Newsom; Joe Perry; Derek Jeter; Heidi Klum; Tim Gunn; Christina Ricci and Adam Goldberg; BJ Novak; Jason Wahler; Joseph Fiennes; Henry Winkler and Cedric the Entertainer; Richard Simmons; Zooey Deschanel; Eva Mendes; Gary Busey; Ricki Lake; Justin Guarini and Amanda Bearse.
· 11/9/16 Whole Foods on Wilshire in Santa Monica:
Whilst grabbing a little late night nosh in whole foods, who should I spot but the Owen "The Butterscotch Stallion" Wilson Himself!
Clad in a dark Jacket, buttery locks stuffed under a dark ball cap, The stallion was successfully able to evade those in the cheese aisle from spotting him, Probably due to the fact that most people would not expect the buttery one himself to be shopping with the plebes. He chatted on his cellphone while he pawed through various baked goods. Resting all urges to speak with him. I checked out and was on my way.
· Voting with me in Hollywood was "new blue eyes" himself—Jake Gyllenhaal, looking just out of bed and very sexy. Now that is an ad for democracy! Put him in front of the polling place and the voter turnout would improve substantially. Actually, he was very sweet to the obviously flustered clerk who just about wet her pants signing him in—it was kinda cute to watch.
· Driving up to Barneys in Beverly Hills right before me on Saturday in his very big, very butch truck, none other than Heath Ledger. Couldn't tell whether it was early Christmas shopping or looking for wardrobe for the Joker—what will the well dressed villain be wearing this season?
· Stalked Morrissey in a parking structure on Beverly Saturday 11/12. He was later spotted shopping in the Gucci store.
Fun fact: Morrissey drives a Toyota Corolla.
· Neil Patrick Harris at the Westwood Equinox on Wednesday, 11-9. Surprisingly, he didn't trigger my gaydar. I'm rusty. But I'd still hit it.
· So I'm at Quick Art Frame on 3rd St. getting the poster to McG's next magnum opus WE ARE MARSHALL framed.
The place was empty, so when a tall, slick-looking black man walks in, I took notice. He was wearing dark shades, a worn baseball cap and was clutching a couple manila envelopes with what I noticed to be well-toned, perhaps even battle-hardened hands.
It was this detail that tipped me off to the true identity of the seemingly incognito man— I realized that it was none other than ISAIAH WASHINGTON, aka DR. McCHOKEY, himself! No wonder those mitts were shaped like bricks— the man has his own, anti-gay-inspired special training routine to build those babies up!
I considered addressing him, but quickly decided against it, lest I be choked myself. I wonder WHAT in those manila envelopes could possibly warrant being framed...
· This may be a little late, but after the Young Progressive Majority's soiree at the Roosevelt on 10/24, I spotted the nerdtacular Adam Brody on his way to the men's room. He wasn't there to protest Bush, though. He was at the uber-trendy adjacent nightclub.
Also, also, the 10:55pm screening of "Stranger Than Fiction" (FANTASTIC flick!) at the Grove on Saturday featured the Apocalypto preview ahead of time. When good ol' Mel Gibson's name flashed up on the screen, there was actual booing and hissing from the crowd. I freakin' LOVE this town!
· 11-14 Andy Dick: Getting out of a car on Robertson talking on his cell phone across the street from the Ivy. Looking very 60's with bell bottom jeans.
· WayansWatch 2006: A solo, beanied Damon Wayans quickly exiting Boa steakhouse in SM sat night around 8:00. Seemed a little early to be finishing dinner, and he looked like he was in a hurry to bail, so maybe he left someone behind?? Also, not sure people care, but San Fran mayor Gavin Newsom was there with a tiny blonde girl half his age (he's 36, right?).
· Went to the 8:50 screening of Borat at the Grove night, Wednesday, November 8th. My boyfriend and I were walking away from the concession stand with our Icee, when we saw a short guy with a mop of black hair and a large nose poking out from behind his tresses — it was Joe Perry from Aerosmith. He and a group of about three guys were using one of those newfangled concession stand-ordering computer kiosks. Who knew you could Fandango popcorn?
· Saturday 11/11/06 spotted Derek Jeter with a guy I didn't recognize at Target in West Hollywood. He sure is funny looking. I don't know what Mariah Carey and Vanessa Minillo saw in him.
Thursday afternoon 11/9/06 spotted Heidi Klum at the Grove with her 2 kids and what looked like 3 nannies though I think one of the women may have been her mother. I know she's about to give birth any day now, but Heidi could have at least brushed her hair. She was dressed in all black and looked like she just rolled out of bed. Her son Henri is super cute in spite of the pink socks he was wearing...
· 11/13: Eating lunch at Wolfgang Puck's restaurant in the Pacific Design Center and saw Tim Gunn from Project Runway. Looks much taller and older in real life. The waitress said to him, "you look really familiar, how do I know you?" He was very nice — no diva attitude at all.
· November 4th - Some friends and I saw Christina Ricci and Adam Goldberg, very low key, at the 9:30 pm Borat screening at the Vista Theater in Los Feliz.
November 7th 11:30 pm - I was at that restaurant Birds on Franklin for a friend's birthday and sitting in the booth next to us was BJ Novak, from my favorite show ever, The Office! He plays Ryan and writes and I think maybe also produces, and is even better looking in person. He was "canoodling" with some really cute young Lisa Loeb-esque girl. I wanted to see if I could get a picture, but they seemed to be in their own little world. I'm kicking myself now.
November 9th - The douchebag Jason Wahler guy from Laguna Beach 1:30 at the Subway on La Brea and Wilshire. I didn't recognize him, but the girl working did. she told him she really liked his show and he was, like, which one? He was really rude and then asked if he could get his sandwich free. He was with a friend and they were both wearing sweatpants. It was actually kind of sad.
· I saw Joseph Fiennes tonight at Aphrodisiac on Santa Monica Blvd with a random chick, both dressed in all black. I walked by their table as I was leaving, where they were sharing some chocolate desserty thing. He is damn fine. Wow. I wish I had noticed earlier that he was there. I would have stared all night. One of the guys I was with said his date has the nicest legs he's ever seen, for what it's worth.
· Friday night November 10th @ Century City AMC
Good thing the fashion Police aren't a real law enforcement agency. If so, they surely would have detained Henry Winkler and booked him on serious charges of wearing the ugliest plaid shirt ever made. Also, Cedric the Entertainer would of have been issued a citation for uncool usage of technology due to talking on a cell phone he was holding up to one ear while the other ear is being covered by the most massive bluetooth headset I've ever seen. robonerd.
· Saturday November 11th about 1pm, Beverly and Maple Drives.
Waiting for a friend I had perhaps the oddest sighting I've ever had: Richard Simmons. He was waiting at the light, his giant head covered by a thinning cloud of wispy curls as he chatted up the girl in the blue Corvette next to him, admonishing her to "eat healthy
The weirdest part was his ride: a black Chevy SSR pick-up. I realised that I saw the same car last week at the same time last week.
Can Hank Azaria start stalking me again?
· 11/11: at Starbucks on Wilshire & 3rd in SM. Zooey Deschanel chatting on a pink razor while dressed in an "elf" like ensemble - green dress, green sweater, all the way down to green boots. I guess 'tis the season.
· Eva Mendes on Sunday at the Sunset+Vine Bed Bath and Beyond, shopping for god know's what with a man I didn't recognize.
· Friday Nov. 10th
I had the best celebrity sighting EVER about an hour ago. I stopped by my doctor's office in Thousand Oaks, as I pulled into the parking lot a sporty, black convertible was making its way out. The driver was taking up a lot of room and had to move to the right in order for my car to get by, I glanced at the driver and I stopped dead in my tracks. Behind the wheel, in all his magnificent crazy glory was GARY BUSEY.
· Saw Ricki Lake hurrying into the Tony Bennett show with her husband Thursday night. They were dressed as if they were going to the opera, which is better than how everyone else was dressed... as if they were going to the prom. Surprisingly, there were a lot of young people there. Everyone was dressed to the nines.
· Best sighting ever! Justin Guarini at the Hollywood Gold's, his Sideshow Bob hair poking out of a bandanna do-rag as he mounted a stationary cycle. I started humming a few bars of ""The Luv' (The Bounce)" from From Justin To Kelly soundtrack in the hopes that he'd notice me, but he just kept looking forward.
· Monday. Saw the lesbian from Married with Children at the Lobster in Santa Monica, Amanda Bearse. Really kind of pretty in person and dressed hot- cute jeans and boots. Now get this- it looked like she was on a date. with a dude. seriously. dude was tall and not an industry type at all. they were holding hands and sharing food and looked totally into each other. WTF?