• Rachel Ray's new husband apparently has a kinky fondness for being spat on, claims a lady he paid to hawk loogies on his face. But not to worry, Rachel: "I virtually supported myself by spitting on him. But there was never any normal sex involved." Oh, phew! [R&M]
  
• Rumors of Tom Hanks's death have been greatly exaggerated. [TMZ]
  
• In Brazil, a cat has given birth to a litter of puppies. Our failure to think of a joke for this (we've been trying all morning) is pretty much the biggest failure of our life thus far. [YahooNews]
  
• Terminator 3's Kristiana Lokken admits she's a lezziebean — with Michelle Rodriguez, her Bloodrayne costar. Related: you are so not going to be able to get anyone in the IT department to come fix your computer today. [Page Six]
  
• Michael Jackson was scary at the World Music Awards. [BWE]
  
• K-Fed wants Britney, and her $$, back — and he thinks singing love songs on her voicemail is gonna do the trick. [National Ledger]
  

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