Charmin = Cuddly Soft. 'NYT' = Rexy

We have to give Charmin's marketing dept their propers. Their ads — the ones with the bears merrily traipsing off to shit in the woods — have always been our favorite because they link toilet paper to its actual purpose, whereas all the other TP companies tend to show people rubbing cottony-soft squares against their (facial) cheeks and pouring blue water on them and stuff. If an alien that didn't poop came to our planet, it would have no clue what toilet paper was actually for if it wasn't for Charmin. And today, we learn from the Times that they're engaging a kind of sweet promotional stunt: intalling a 20-seat temporary lavatory in Times Square, just in time for the onslaught of Pumpkin Spice Latte-full holiday shopper tourists. Way to go, Charmin!

But wait — that's not the only upside of these new loos, the Times reasons: "In Manhattan, chances to get rid of that morning coffee are few and far between." Ugh, we totally KNOW! At least now, the people who work at 4 Times Square will have a place to do that without everyone in the next stall, like, overhearing.

Charmin to New York: Go In Style
[NYT]