We still haven't figured out whether A.J. has a blog or not, but if he did, it'd look a lot like this one. Then again, this could also conceivably be the work of one of these guys. Either way, this is what you're dealing with when you're competing for VIP table space these days.
The line is long, but the bouncer spots our ties (each of which costs more than his Kia) and ushers us to the front. We buy bottles.
Incidentally, your guest editor wouldn't be able to spot an expensive tie if you wrapped one around his neck and choked him with it.