Joe Dolce Sets The Record Gay

We're turning over a new leaf with poor soon-to-be unemployed Star editor Joe Dolce. True, the old regime here didn't get along with him, but we wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. So we called to ask him to confirm or deny the fake rumor (uh, that we started) about him getting into business with Judy Regan.

Ring ring! "This is Joe," Joe Dolce told us. He did sound a little like Tim Gunn! But he sounded like Tim Gunn congratulating a 5 year old for shitting on a Chanel dress. We liked him already!

We apologized a few dozen times for interrupting Joe in the middle of whatever important thing he was undoubtedly doing, and then launched immediately into our questioning. Were he and Judy really starting an lit agency called Free Agents?

"Anyone knows me knows that would not be a pairing that would work."

Uh, gee whiz. Why?

"I'll leave that to your readers. They can read between the lines."

So Judith Regan doesn't seem like a fun workmate?

(Pause.) "I've had many relationships with difficult women in my life. I'm not looking for more."

Oooh!

And then, after briefly chiding us for not Photoshopping his head bigger (but we made him so tall!), he was gone, leaving us only with memories and our giant collection of Star back issues to remember him by. Well, for now.

(Clarification: Joe called to correct us: he has had many relationships with difficult women, not many difficult relationships with women. He doesn't want anyone to think he is "a misogynist!")