Each week, thousands of reader comments are rejected by our sharp-eyed hall monitor Intern Kaila. In honor of today's closing ceremonies for an American icon, we have selected some of the most interesting rejected comments concerning the late Anna Nicole Smith. Please bear in mind that all these comments are real, and that individuals actually sat down and typed them out, sometimes even spell-checking them first. We may mock our regular commenters on occasion, but you guys are positively Shakespearean compared to these folks. Take a look:
Re: And Now She's Dead: Anna Nicole Smith: "A sad young lady got what she reached for; a hand full of fame to eat with sugar and white flour. Walmart queen of no consequence. Sleep well fluff ball. Fear not for your daughter. We have her well in mind. She will be dipped in honey and tossed to the wind. Her protectors will work for her interest as they did for your own. Love and peace dear queen of this mortal play. We are bested by your passing."
Howard K. Stern Actually Slept With Anna Nicole Smith: "All these bastards make me sick. Anna Nichole Smith was a beautiful woman. She loved her son and baby daughter. I do believe she loved Howard K. Stern. I do believe he is the baby,s daddy. She put his name on the birth record and that is how it should stay. her deranged mother who she hated just wants money and fame. LarryScrewhead is an ass and he wants who knows what. I am so glad the judge had a heart to bury her by her son which she wanted. She was going to marry Howard K Stern because she loved him and had a baby with him and that should be enough for any judge and any court. The hell with the rest of them money hungry bastards . Howard I think you are a wonderful man and hope you and Dannilynn have a wonderful, happy life together."
Well, something's been proven.