So, yes, we've seen the now-infamous video of Ann Coulter calling John Edwards a faggot. We didn't get too riled up at first, because we thought she kind of had a good point! (Kidding, kidding.) Really, we didn't think too much of it, just because ol' Annie has spent the better part of her life in the company of homosexuals. After years of standing by her gays—and what right-wing woman hasn't done time with a gaggle of sniping queens? Hello, Nancy Reagan?—we figure Ann has basically earned the right to reclaim "faggot" all on her own. Unfortunately, she's lost just about all of her girl-gang by now. (She's alienated pretty much all the straight friends by now, for that matter.) But now who will hold her long luxurious hair back during those long nights vomiting after too many tequilas? Now who'll drive around with her in South Beach with the top down, screaming into the hot breeze the important early work of Madonna? Really, it's just all too sad to consider.

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