Dear Boston Newspaper Guild,
I read in the Globe this morning (yes, I was one of the Globe's five readers today!) how you're pissing and moaning about our plans to outsource fifty jobs to India. I understand how this decision is one that causes hardship for your members, and I'd like to tell you that it was a difficult decision to make. Actually, I'd like to tell you to suck on it: This was actually an easier decision than kicking Abe Rosenthal's senile ass to the curb. Guess what, Globesters? You're killing me.
Oh boo hoo, Bangalore! You are dragging the NYTCo's stock to the goddamn ground. You're the reason I've got to sit and listen to some schmuck from Morgan Stanley tell me how I should give up control of my company. Don't believe me? Read our 10-K statement, it's all there. Sure, it's tedious and difficult to get through, but it's still more entertaining and upbeat than your Sidekick section.
Guess what, Globe. Them jobs are goin', and they ain't comin' back! Everyone who's ever worked in management understands that the real money-loser is the cost of staff. (It's that health insurance! No, really!) Shall I let you in on another little secret? There's plenty more of that to come! Don't like it? Try to buy some more ads in your own paper, that'll make you feel better. You want me to sell you to Jack Welch, show you what real management looks like? Couple of print gigs going to India will feel like a birthday present compared to what happens when Jack goes Sigma Six on your ass. So here's my suggestion: Sell more papers or shut the fuck up and take it.
Arthur "Pinch" Sulzberger, Jr.