A Dukes of Hazzard-themed evening at the Cincinnati Pops featuring the vocal talents of Duke brothers John Schneider and Tom Wopat has been cancelled after the local NAACP branch complained about the show's "racist overtones"—namely, the Confederate flag painted on the roof of the General Lee. Coming to their defense is trusted mechanic and ally Cooter Davenport—i.e. intermittently employed actor and one-term Georgia Democratic Congressman Ben Jones—who rails on vanity website Cooter's Place against the censorious powers denying Cincinnatians the experience of Luke Duke being backed by full brass, strings and percussion sections on a rousing, clap-along rendition of "Up On Cripple Creek":
"I wish I was making this up," said [Ben "Cooter"] Jones. "But, unfortunately it is true. It is bizarre. One reason our show is loved by folks of all colors all over the world is that racism is non-existent in Hazzard County. It is an innocent show where the good guys always win and nobody gets hurt, and brotherhood is a natural thing there. What could these politically correct vigilantes possibly be thinking?
Yet again, the brothers find themselves fightin' the system like a true modern day Robin Hood, only instead of battling Boss Hogg's nefarious plans to turn their family farm into a coal mine, they now find themselves pit against far more threatening P.C. forces, who find the prominent placement of a Dixie-honking, Confederate-flag-adorned vehicle nearly as offensive as the show's popularizing of Davey Dukes, the sexy denim short-shorts favored by white supremacists everywhere.
- SINGERS CANNED BY ORCHESTRA BECAUSE OF CLASSIC T.V. SHOW [Cooter's Place]