Stalk of the Town: Vince Vaughn Gets Post-Adoption Laid

The date: March 18, 2007
The place: 72nd at West End Ave.
Sighting: I saw Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston getting into a car today. Hooray!

Come on now tipster, the above sighting might be thrilling but it's not exactly surprising, not to anyone familiar with Min's Third Law of Celebrity Motion, anyway. Wherein it is dictated that every action by Angelina Jolie must be followed by an equal, opposite and booze-fueled reaction by Jennifer Aniston.

Action: Angelina lures Brad Pitt to Africa with promises of animal-style African sex, also to be a part of the adoption of her second child Zahara. Reaction: Jen gets drunk and makes out with Vince Vaughn.

Action: Angelina tells Brad in order to continue sleeping with her he needs to officially adopt her offspring. He files the papers. Reaction: Jen gets drunk on Margaritas and makes out with Vince Vaughn.

Action: Birth Of Shiloh or B.O.S, a power move by Angelina. Reaction: Jen buys herself a huge rock, wears it to the premiere of her movie and denies that she is engaged to Vince Vaughn, knowing that will only make people believe it more. And also probably gets drunk.

Unfortunately, the natural order of things got disturbed when Vince did everything but with a mouthy sorority girl and Jen was forced to dump him to save face. However, desperate times call for desperate measures and in the face of Angie's third adoption, it looks as if Jen has returned to her old standby.

A puffy standby, who is probably just happy to get laid at all these days. And so it goes. The epic battle between Betty and Veronica rages on. Vince Vaughn, Brad Pitt and all those little orphans? Nothing more than pawns, the swollen corpses of which will soon be left abandoned on the battlefield.