Brooklyn Food Group: They Eat Babies, Don't They?

With contemptuous Jews and indulgent Gentiles, squadrons of strollers and the occasional stuck tampon, Brooklyn outpaces its smaller brother Manhattan in as many measures as man can devise. One such measure we devised: The Most Pretentious Dining Club Invitation Circulated on A Brown Alumni Message Board. Representing Brooklyn is the Brooklyn Food Group. Among the nearly unimpeachable arguments in Brooklyn's favor, "Dress is Brooklyn chic, that is, casual" and "Setting will be elegant, company will be eclectic, and cuisine is what we call 'free-range Brooklyn'—always seasonal, always fresh, always exciting." Ooh, free-range Brooklyn? I can't wait for a free-range Brooklyn toddler gently roasted in a cilantro-lime marinade.

Dear Guests:

In anticipation of spring and in celebration of all things delicious and all things Brooklyn, the Brooklyn Food Group cordially invites you to its first tasting event on Saturday, April 21st at seven o'clock p.m.

Having felt for quite a while that that the restaurant experience in New York is becoming dreary, and with a firm belief that food, when approached and enjoyed correctly, can foster genuine happiness, laughter, intimacy, and growth, we at the Brooklyn Food Group strive to create something novel. Thus the BFG: a roving venue where our guests not only purchase food, but also share in our effort to savor and celebrate it. The upcoming event will be a five-course, sit-down meal, located in the spacious Fort Greene apartment of a generous friend. Setting will be elegant, company will be eclectic, and cuisine is what we call "free-range Brooklyn"—always seasonal, always fresh, always exciting.

Cost is $50.00/person and RSVP is required. We will take reservations on a first-come, first-served basis, and unfortunately we cannot confirm your seat until we've received payment (for easy online payment, please visit brooklynfoodgroup.blogspot.com). Dress is Brooklyn chic, that is, casual. Liquor is BYO.

We hope to see all of you there and please feel free to forward this email to anyone who you think might be interested now or in the future.

Warm wishes,
The Brooklyn Food Group

—Josh