Lindsay Lohan's Searching And Fearless Moral Inventory Reveals She's Probably Not An Addict, So Time To Hit The Clubs!

While the cynical may have viewed Lindsay Lohan's recent stint as an outpatient at the Wonderland Center (motto: "Working Around The Busy Hollywood Schedule That Drove You To Drug Abuse In The First Place Since 1983") as nothing more than a thinly veiled image-reclamation field trip, the troubled actress seems to have nonetheless used her publicist-mandated drying-out time to come to some incredible revelations about her lifestyle, as Lohan tells Allure:

"It's so weird that I went to rehab. I always said I would die before I went to rehab."
Even though she's under the legal drinking age, Lindsay says she has no intention of giving up her late-night club hopping.

"That's my life!" she says.

In fact, she tells the magazine — after a year of attending AA meetings — "I don't know that I'm necessarily an addict."

It now seems abundantly clear that Lohan did learn some incredibly valuable lessons during her program, like ones about the dangers of certitude and the importance of having the courage to ask difficult questions of oneself; only the bravest of us could emerge from a year of support meetings and a month-long stint in a recovery program, ask the faint reflection in our Sidekick screen, "Do you think maybe that whole rehab deal was a waste of time?" and be able to truthfully respond, "Totally! I probably didn't have a problem in the first place!"