In the Wall Street Journal Weekend Edition, Karen Richardson has a wonderful story about World's Second Richest Person Warren Buffet — he's a bit like John the Baptist to Bill Gate's Jesus — and how he's cutely put out an A.P.B. for a man (yes, MAN; let's not kid ourselves) to replace him as Berkshire Hathaway's Chief Investment Officer. You can imagine the meta-narrative all this fits into:
Now, the résumés are flooding in — and the process is turning out to be every bit as unconventional as the billionaire investor himself. Among the 600 or so applicants so far: a Talmudic scholar who picks stocks from home, a Canadian economist with an intense yoga practice and even a four-year-old.And so it appears the rich really aren't like you and me; the Idol reference suggests Buffett's one of the two or three folks alive that haven't had Donald Trump personally garlic-breath scream in their face about The Apprentice. But, no matter. Consider the possibilities!To wit, Simon Cowell replaced by let-me-make-my-money-then-shut-the borders Lou Dobbs! Randy Jackson's yo dawgs swapped out for Jim Cramer's boo-yahs! Paula Abdul's benzodiazepine slurs supplanted by Maria Bartiromo collagen-injection purrs! To say nothing of the contestants!
"We're going to run this like 'American Idol' in the end," the 76-year-old Mr. Buffett quipped in an interview.
There'd be early-round ritual humiliation:
What [a trial period] isn't, however, is a mentorship program, something many applicants have misinterpreted. He says he isn't looking for someone to teach, but for "someone who already knows how to do it."And, after all that, the Aiken/Guarini train wrecks will still slip through, throwing into flux all conventional notions of irony, pitchiness, and secondary sex characteristics:
The misunderstanding is reflected in dozens of letters from students, profession investors and a surprising number of engineers and lawyers hoping to be apprenticed [natch!] to the master. "I assure you," wrote one 20-year-old college student, "although I may be short on experience, I am very long on potential." [Ed: Sure you are, Aleksey] A lawyer in Oregon recommended his four-year-old son, characterizing the toddler as a "great negotiator" on issues such as "bedtime, chores, allowance, baths, etc."
In Ottawa, economist Klaus Kostenbauer takes a more spiritual approach. As manager of Prosperous Yogi Investments, he regularly practices a rigorous form of yoga call kundalini, and mediates several hours a week.Just like my blogging, Mr. Buffett! Except it's also taught me a bit about constructing structurally parallel sentences!
"My yoga makes me a better investor," says Mr. Kostenbauer, 40. "It helps with discipline, mastery of your emotions, and mastery of greed, fear and patience."
Please read the whole article. Political economy is fake.