Vanilla Ice Will Kill Someone Soon

The date: April 28, 2007
The place: 42nd and 2nd
Sighting: Vanilla Ice in the flesh at McFadden's Saturday night around midnight. Made a big entrance and got behind the bar, but never actually sang. Ice Ice Baby did play in the background. Looked as good as a former Surreal Life star can... tattoos and tilted hat and all.

There are two possibilities for what's going on in the above sighting. Either Vanilla Ice is doing some sort of "celebrity" bartending at McFadden's or, having reached the bottom of the washed-up celebrity reality-television trough, Ice has gone and gotten himself a bartending job to pay the bills. Either way, the fact that he's serving drinks while his own song plays in the background like some sort of Rocky-esque theme is, at first glance, hilarious. However, when one stops for a second and remembers what Celebreality has taught us about Mr. Van Winkle's temper, the concept moves from funny to frightening.

Maybe he never really got over being forced to dress like this, or perhaps it was the chilly reception of his rebel-without-a-cause inspired flick, Cool as Ice, but anyone who caught the finale of "Surreal Life Fame Games" knows that this man is only one insult away from becoming the first person to actually murder someone on television.

Starting with an assault on an innocent MTV set back in 1999 and continuing in 2001 with an arrest for ripping his wife's hair out, Ice's temper is well documented. Which brings us to a third, more probable theory as to what Ice is doing behind the bar at McFadden's: VH1's newest Celebreality show ("Cracking the Ice"?).

Face it: After Danny Bonaduce let everyone down and made it through two full seasons without killing himself or anyone else, putting Vanilla Ice in such close proximity to a group of drunk New Yorkers is the obvious next step in the search for an on-camera homicide. Kudos to whichever producer had the guts to reach for that elusive Celebreality brass ring. We just wouldn't recommend hitting McFadden's on a Saturday anytime soon.

Previously: Joey Lawrence Knows His Place