Peter Braunstein Could Have Saved Chocolate City

Yesterday Dr. William Barr, the prosecution's final witness in the kidnapping and sex abuse trial of lovesexyhatefireman Peter Braunstein, testified as to Braunstein's plans in the wake of his attack and subsequent flight. The South would rise again! (But in the good way!)

"He talked about going to New Orleans because he thought there were a lot of angry people down there and he could provide them some kind of leadership," Barr testified.

He said that Braunstein saw the gang as having "people just like me" and that his speeches would be "mixed with some kind of end-of-the-world philosophy."

Braunstein's plan was interrupted by that whole knife-in-the-neck thing in Memphis, which is sort of a shame. The idea of a throng of beleaguered Crescent City residents marching north until they finally reached 4 Times Square to carry out their leader's ultimate goal of killing Anna Wintour is so rich with fictional possibilities that only a Robert Penn Warren could do it justice. Or Lauren Weisberger. Either way.

Braunstein Wanted to Lead 'Katrina Gang' [AP]