With the media gathered at the orgy developing outside Paris Hilton's house greedily filling each quivering news-hole in the aftermath of the heiress's unexpected release from lock-up, we salute the LAT for uncovering an orifice that had yet to be penetrated. In detailing the chaotic scene at the Kings Road Regional Detention Facility, the Times brings word of which of the area's warring cupcake factions was first to the scene with snack; unsurprisingly, the treat-pushing attention-whores from Mrs. Beasley's arrived with the cameras:
The most exciting moment was about 10:30 a.m. when a Mrs. Beasley's Gourmet Cupcakes van pulled up and Anthony Crisafulli delivered three containers of the treats to the house.
"She hasn't eaten well while she's been away," Crisafulli said, noting that Hilton had called the Beverly Hills store this morning. She is a regular customer, he said, noting her favorite cupcakes are strawberry and mocha.
Mrs. Beasly's comforting presence eases our anxieties about the conditions of Hilton's home-imprisonment. Thankfully, the terms of her house arrest seem flexible enough to allow the psychologically fragile inmate the kinds of comforts so cruelly withheld from her during her "five" day stint in Lynwood, a compassionate policy that will perhaps forestall a psychotic episode in which Hilton skins alive, and then devours, her beloved kinkajou as she struggles with her loss of freedom.
- A media circus outside Paris' house [LAT]
- Previously: Orlando Bloom Latest Casualty Of Bloody Cupcake War [Defamer]