Coney Island's march towards transformation into Disneyland By JFK has taken a slight detour. Developer Joseph Sitt's plans to appeal to local residents thus far unenthused by his Brobdingnagian entertainment-lifestyle complex have received a few tweaks. Now the luxury apartments initially planned by Sitt will be instead be hotels, timeshares, bookstores and theaters. This is great news for all sorts of non-Hispanic minority-types!
The hotels, Mr. Sitt said, would offer black residents not only jobs, but careers. The Russian immigrants, who enjoy a 'quality of life and activity by the water,' would flock to the hotels and nightclubs. Jewish and Italian-American residents would get the "quality retail, bookstores and entertainment venues" that they want. As for everyone else, "what's better than having fabulous restaurants, catering halls, shows and concerts?"
Now the only questions left are whether the new Coney Island will include large animatronic dolls in national dress singing songs promoting unity and also where they're gonna put those damn gay midgets?