Aged downtown art rock gods Sonic Youth have signed a deal with Starbucks to do a celebrity-compiled Sonic Youth sampler CD. Why? Can they not afford the hip replacements or something? So Marc Jacobs and Portia de Rossi apparently will choose their favorite Sonic Youth songs and off it'll go to sit in front of the register, right up there with the Alison Krauss and the Maroon 5 and the Mitch Albom. Awesome. The sad part is that Marc Jacobs might not be smart enough to actually identify a song. Or the band. This is, after all, the man who once introduced "The Bitter Tears of Petra von Kant" at a Soho House screening as a "great movie about fashion." Sure honey.