Our Enthusiasm For Elective Plastic Surgery May Be Getting Out Of Hand

As anyone who's ever gone under the knife in a desperate attempt to stay competitive with the kittens who keep stealing all the fresh cougar bait knows all too well, facelifts don't last forever. Those who remember the last time we elected for some minor blogoplasty can probably guess that the surgeon interrupted us before we could get out a single response to his "tell me what you don't like about yourself" invitation, choosing instead to go batshit upon our humbled, naked form with his unforgiving grease pencil. We're still a little unsure about the results, but he did gently whisper a promise that we'll come to love his work once the swelling goes down as we luxuriated on his bearskin rug, exhausted from a vigorous round of coitus.

Well spare you an inventory of everything we've had bolted on, sliced off, or vacuumed out in our efforts to stay pretty for you, as it's much more fun to discover the changes on your own. But please let us know what you think in the comments or by e-mailing us at tips[AT]defamer.com. And if you see anyting weird, send us a screengrab (if possible) and information about your operating system and browser, and we'll have the trouble spot tightened up as soon as medically possible.