After much discussion, we have come to the conclusion that it might be possible that Oberlin is not, in fact, the most annoying liberal arts college in the world. (Though there's some pretty strong evidence in its favor.) So we've come up with a list of contenders. We acknowledge that most people probably don't have first-hand experience with each of these schools, but we'd like you to think long and hard about your experiences with their graduates, which should be enough to allow you to make blanket generalizations about the nature of the colleges. Also, consider this your introduction; there will be a poll, and later a crowning of the Most Annoying Liberal Arts College In The World. Maybe they'll get a diploma from us! Write-in candidates will also be considered.
The Contenders (in alphabetical order)
- Bard: Upstate New York haven for rich, disaffected filmmakers, writers, grade-skippers and artists.
- Bennington: Hippie haven in Vermont with optional grades and lots of "creative" types. (Bonus: Bret Easton Ellis went there. Then, so did Jared Paul Stern.)
- Brown (honorary liberal arts college): Eurotrash and rich hipster magnet in Providence, R.I.
- Hampshire: This "non-traditional" college in Amherst, MA calls itself "experimenting." Whatever that means.
- Kenyon: There's not much to do here besides go drink in the Ohio woods. Also, maybe too preppy for our list, maybe.
- Oberlin: Asked and answered.
- Reed: They're smarter than you. Just ask. Even though they're baked. Also: West Coast represent!
- Sarah Lawrence: Breeding ground of coked-up artsy heiresses and the lone faggy heir.
- Smith: Lesbians and the LUGS who love them.
- Vassar: Favorite of budding editorial assistants everywhere. Male population: See under Sarah Lawrence.
- Wesleyan: Our instinctive favorite to take the crown, if only because if we have to hear about one more awesome party at Eclectic we might slit our wrists. Also, heroin is all fun and games until you can't get out of rehab, isn't it!
So there you have it. Mull it over, give us your thoughts—and be ready to vote tomorrow.