Tom Cruise Can Really Fill Out A Uniform


Behold Tom Cruise, would-be assassin of Hitler. RopeOfSilicone.com has early publicity photos from Valkyrie, the ongoing Cruise project that notably clashed with the German government over its desire to flood sites of historical, Nazi-hunting import with Hollywood movie magic, an imbroglio that was either logistical or Scientological in nature, depending on which Teutonic official was quoted. Still, even if there's an institutional fear of totalitarianism in post-WWII Germany, any fears of a Scientology takeover should be dispelled by the image of Cruise in uniform, who looks way too adorable in his eyepatch and funny hat to lead any kind of credible invasion.

[Photo: United Artists]