Brad Stone, the baddest tech reporter that ever was born

Fake Brad Stone is doing a passable job of celebrating the career of the ruggedly handsome New York Times reporter who outed Fake Steve Jobs. Passable. I mean, I like the idea of supplanting the Pulitzer Prize with a new "Stoney" award. But Fake Brad could do so much more. He could, for example, burst into song. With apologies to George Thorogood — and, while I'm at it, to Brad Stone, Fake Brad Stone, and my readers — Valleywag presents a rock-and-roll celebration of our favorite Timesman. Here are the lyrics to "Brad to the Stone":


On the day I was hired, the Timesmen all gathered 'round
Those hacks all gazed in envy at the ex-Newsweek reporter they'd found
Then Bill Keller spoke up, and he said leave this one alone
He could tell right away, that I was Brad to the Stone
Brad to the Stone
Brad to the Stone
B-B-B-B-Brad to the Stone
B-B-B-B-Brad
B-B-B-B-Brad
Brad to the Stone

I broke a thousand stories, before I wrote about you
I'll break a thousand more baby, before I am through
I'm gonna break your cover, Fake Stevie, in your PJs all alone
I'm here to tell ya bloggers, that I'm Brad to the Stone
Brad to the Stone
B-B-B-Brad
B-B-B-Brad
B-B-B-Brad
Brad to the Stone

I make a rich CEO beg not to cover his shady deal
I'll make the Gray Lady blush, and make other tech reporters squeal
I wanna be your ink-stained wretch, yours and yours alone
I'm here to tell ya bloggers, that I'm Brad to the Stone
B-B-B-B-Brad
B-B-B-B-Brad
B-B-B-B-Brad
Brad to the Stone