• Kevin Federline has subpoena'd a bunch of Britney Spears' ex-nannies, and they don't have a lot of good things to say about her parenting skills. 'Drunk With The Babies' may be our favorite Us cover line of all time. [Us Weekly]
  
• Also, it's seeming like Britney will make a 'surprise' appearance at the MTV VMAs on September 9th, unless she pulls out at the last minute and surprises everyone even more deeply. [R&M, last item]
  
• "Is Val Kilmer too scared to play Adolf Hitler, or is he just too bloated?" [Page Six]
  
• Speaking of bloat, SNL casualty Jimmy Fallon proposed to his longtime girlfriend Nancy Juvonen, who's Drew Barrymore's business partner. [Page Six]

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