"Oh No They Didn't" is alleging that chef Chris Fischer is Jake Gyllenhaal's boyfriend—Fischer was (perhaps still is?) a sous chef at Babbo. The two were most recently spotted running a race on Martha's Vineyard. That is so clearly gay! (That was sarcastic.) There are two camps of crazy gays these days: the other camp thinks that Jake and actor Austin Nichols were until recently dating. But we're going to go with Chris (even though his people have also been heard defending Chris and Jake's relationship by saying that they've been friends since childhood), because, clearly, Jake has had a thing for chefs for forever.
As we learned the hard way not long back, Jake and Mario Batali are also old family friends. And! In this week's New Yorker, the meandering opening to Tables for Two—or rather, the excuse to bring up the story about Brad Pitt having worked at El Pollo Loco, where he was made to dress up like a chicken—mentions that Jake Gyllenhaal frequents new-ish Midtown Italian restaurant Insieme because "As a teen-ager, [Gyllenhaal] washed dishes for the chef Marco Canora, who was in the midst of his first big-time gig, at Tom Colicchio's Craft." Hmm! So when he wants to visit the restaurant, Gyllenhaal simply calls Canora and comes by with his mother. The original beard! Or maybe he just likes getting free meals.