"Of course," said the great modernist painter and photographer Man Ray, "there will always be those who look only at technique, who ask 'how', while others of a more curious nature will ask 'why'. Personally, I have always preferred inspiration to information." It is in that spirit that Alex Blagg finds inspiration from the photos of vapid hipsters wasting space at Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, and Misshapes. Ready to be inspired? Good: It's Blue States Lose!
10.Misshapes. August 4th, 2007 photo #027: Seeing as how she writes a semi-popular blog determining what is and is not stylish, we must assume that being all silly and jumping around Misshapes in a floral print bathwrap is totally hot right now!
9.The Cobrasnake. Highfive Mike B photo #8037: This guy drank so much Smart Water that he actually turned into a genius whose daring fashion sensibility and drug-related inability to properly nourish himself stems from intellectual ideas so advanced and complex that my own small mind is incapable of even trying to fathom them.
8. Misshapes. August 4th, 2007 photo #034: When did the Latin Kings start letting foppish dandies in fitted shirts and designer scarf-ties into their street gang?
7. Last Night's Party. Sickened photo #9991: Only Last Night's Leibovitz can make what appears to be date rape on a bathroom floor seem quite so...beautiful.
6. The Cobrasnake. Bone Thugs photo #8518: You know, some people really make optimism seem impossible.
5. The Urban Outfitters Blog (those are the four most obnoxious words I've typed in a long time). Big announcement about The Cobrasake's coffeetable book: Well it would seem that our old friend The Cobrasnake has made a deal to put his photos of fucked up hipsterteens into a coffeetable book that will be sold alongside the ironic shower curtains at Urban Outfitters. I'm expecting the Blue States Lose Book Deal call from Old Navy any day now.
4. Last Night's Party. GPH photo #0737: This half-naked hipster chick must be one of those Suicide Girls, because her pathetic attempt at photographed sexiness is so unbearably lamesad that it sort of makes me want to off myself.
3. Misshapes. August 4th, 2007 photo #010: This Champion of Fabulousness spent the better part of his life on a tireless scavenger hunt for the clothing and accessories necessary to fashion the most pointlessly unappealing ensemble ever worn to a hipster party, and boy was it all worth it.
2. The Cobrasnake. Highfive Mike B photo #8120: If "Dressing Like A Cliche Douche From LA" were a Special Olympic sport (as it should be), my fellow judges and I would be holding up our 10.0 score cards proudly, feeling honored to have witnessed such a remarkably flawless execution of form.
1. The Cobrasnake. Daft Punk Montreal photo #5543: Hey everybody! Look at this crazywacky thing I spent all day making to put on my head so people will pay attention to me! It's kind of like a whole bunch of bad ideas combined their powers to form the Voltron of Morons! Pretty funny, right guys!?! Man, I'm SO fucking Daft Punk!
Previously: Blue States Lollapalooza