Britney Spears Can Still Buy And Sell You

  • Kevin Federline admits, via the latest filing in his divorce from Britney Spears, that he's worth exactly zero dollars and zero cents, and he's wanting a handout from his ex, who makes—sigh—$737,868 a month. [NYP]
  • British actor Steve Coogan swears his ex-gf Courtney Love's allegations about his indefatigable drug use are false. Man, Steve. Courtney Love calling you a massive drug addict. That's like ... Carnie Wilson calling you fat ... in 1994? Meh. Analogies fail us. [Page Six]
  • Newslady Paula Zahn's divorce gets even nastier. [R&M]