What's better than a skateboard race in MoMA, better than a naked hipster olympic javelin toss, better than that time you went out barefoot for a cigarette late one August night and immediately felt a big fat slug go *squish* between your toes? Why it's Alex Blagg's weekly tour of the youngster party pics on Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party and Nicky Digital. That's the sexy horrible summer feeling that is Blue States Lose!
10.The Cobrasnake. Spin Art photo #0002: It's nice to see Captain Manliness still fighting the good fight against things that are not obnoxious.
9.The Cobrasnake. Spin Art photo #0123: Here's some douche in designer camo playing the saxophone in the middle of one of the many parades of retardation marching through LA at a given moment.
8. Last Night's Party. Trash Forever photo #9664: This might seem like such a big dumb cliche of a photograph that it's physically uncomfortable for you to look at, but that's nothing a good old-fashioned fire hose couldn't fix.
7. The Cobrasnake. Spin Art photo #8870: Yeah, man! Fuck the fucking Roman Empire! Let's take to the streets and get the fucking word out on the mind-blowing vortex of sheer fucking awesomeness that is Los Angeles, and let's do it by slapping neon stickers for hipster picture-takers on the back of traffic signals! Viva la revolucion! Look at my fucking pants!
6. The Cobrasnake. Spin Art photo #0165: This is what happens when you overdose on pot AND crystal meth at the same time.
5. Last Night's Party. United 2 photo #1002: Don't worry, thanks to his magic wizardhippie glasses and tribal earring, this douchenazi is too fucking ridiculous to be mistaken for a serious anti-Semite.
4. The Cobrasnake. Spin Art photo #8930: Yay, a new 12 year-old girl to take pictures of eating fast food and wearing your retarded t-shirts! Can someone just go ahead set up her photo shoot for the cover of Paper Magazine, please?
3. Last Night's Party. United 2 photo #1099: Just so you know, your rent is going up to make room for more of these.
2. Nicky Digital. Loaded @ Lotus photo #54776: Alright trannies, listen up, because this is the last time I'm going to say this. If you're going to go through all the trouble to squeeze yourself into a 90's neon spandex tutu ensemble, and put on a bunch of make-up to look like the pretty little girl that you are, you need to just go ahead and lose he goatee. I mean, really - it doesn't make sense.
1. Last Night's Party. Trash Forever photo #9653: There's just something evil about this picture. Like right before it was taken, that creepy old dude quietly muttered, "Who wants to get raped for some heroin?"