"Hey, Hymie! Wanna get in on the best deal of the fall? Shh, c'mere. I've got a pair of tickets to the High Holiday services at Temple Emanu-El — you know, the one that Spitzer and Bloomberg go to — that I'm willing to part with at a major loss! You will not find a better deal than this all season, Jewish word of honor! Everyone knows that God only listens your prayers if you're praying alongside famous people! Don't be a schmuck your whole life, snap up these scalped temple tickets today!" Actually, we didn't even need to go with a joke on this one. The Craigslist pitch alone is enough.

Come celebrate the Jewish New Year and Day of Atonment with New York's most elite Jews. Mayor Michael Bloomberg, Governor Elliot Spitzer, DA Robert Morganthau and Top Wall Street Executives, to name a few...

I have 2 tickets to both of the following events:
Rosh Hashanah September 13, 2007
Yom Kippur September 22, 2007

These tickets are only given to members of Congrigation Emanu-El and if you weigh the membership dues against the low, low price of $150 per ticket in section C; you are making out with the best deal of the season. Take a look at what the members pay:

Per Seat Section
$1,290 A
$1,100 B
$960 C
$710 D

Remember 5769 only happens once, why not celebrate at one of the most beautiful houses of worship in the world?

Contact information for this author is not available.