Yesterday, we heard from an alumna of Manhattan's all-girl Hewitt School whose classmates made her feel poor because she didn't hobnob with the King of Morocco. But, she said, those rich bitches "always wanted to hear about Chapin. That's where all the dirty crazy action was supposed to be." Today, a Chapin alumna fills in the blanks! Also, Dirty Crazy Action is coming to NBC next fall.

I went to Chapin. We had the same little rhyme about the doctors- but it was concentrated on Brearly, Chapin and Nightingale. Spence was for JAPS. Hewitt was for the dumb girls. In my class we had a girl who beat up another girl with a lacrosse stick (but they were both Prep-for-Prep girls, so maybe that doesn't count). We also had several coke addicts, the usual bulimics and anorexics, a pair of twins (one of whom was schizo) overachievers galore, several heiresses to large impressive fortunes and some slutty girls who were almost kicked out for sneaking out of our D.C. hotel and going bar hopping. Obviously there was a cluster of bitches. Lucky for me they all left in 8th grade to become bitches at boarding school. We were a pretty nerdy class after that. Though one grade below was The Donald's daughter, who was regularly jetting off to Milan for shows. Probably all the girls schools were the same. The worst part was that all boys schools ended after 8th grade- so there was Penis Drain on the city- all we had was Browning (ew) and Collegiate (ugh). Now what's a girl to do with that???

Dunno! Fuck plebes?