CNN's coverage this morning of the Clinton Global Initiative featured a wacky live interview with CNN mastermind, United Nations bankroller and possibly compulsive wife-stealer Ted Turner. His inquisitor, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, was clearly pained by the experience. Their conversation included gems from Turner like, "It's the seventh inning and humanity's down two runs!" and "Polio's not as sexy right now as HIV/AIDS or measles or malaria." (Um, the Clinton global public health folks might not sign on to this sentiment!) Also? Ted's sporting some seriously ill-advised facial hair, but it's not like he cares what people think or anything. We can't decide if we want someone to pay him to stay away from the cameras, because maybe he should just have his own crazy public access show?