Publicists To Book Paris Hilton On First Flight To Rwanda After Next Movie Role

Perhaps concerned that the public might not be internalizing the post-incarceration "Paris Hilton is now a productive, selfless, and globally aware member of society" message they're pushing as quickly as they'd planned, Hilton's image-rehabilitation team is temporarily tabling those obviously ineffective Children's Hospital drop-ins in favor of a more dramatic plan: a trip to Rwanda, a place so war-torn and impoverished that no one will be able to accuse her of being there to raise awareness of her perfume or clothing lines:

"There's so much need in that area, and I feel like if I go, it will bring more attention to what people can do to help," Hilton said of the region. [...]
"I want to visit more countries where poverty and children's issues are a big concern," the 26-year-old socialite said. "I know there's a lot of good I can do just by getting involved and bringing attention to these issues."

Tragically, no matter how effectively Hilton can deliver her publicists' expertly crafted talking points, there will always be those who doubt the sincerity of her transformation. (Has she even picked out a favorite Bible story yet?) We expect that her handlers will be closely monitoring the media reaction to her trip as it unfolds, hoping that the cynicism will be subdued enough that they don't have to resort to their last-ditch strategy: sending Paris back to the States with an adorable Rwandan orphan in tow, promising that she won't cease her charitable, globe-trotting activities until "I've collected more cute babies than Brad and Angie."