94 years ago, liar H.K. McCann launched his NYC ad agency with the slogan "Truth Well Told." That was a big fat lie. Advertising copywriter Copyranter brings you instances of advertising lies and the lying liars who sell them.
This summer in Munich, a ubiquitous subway poster featured a photo of a woman's ass. And not just any ass; this was an ass that should be used as an erectile dysfunction test by urologists. This ass belongs in a Museum of Modern Ass. When we speak of history's great asses, this is the kind of ass of which we speak. It is the platonic ideal of ass. But! German do-gooders covered many copies of this arsche with posters that called this ad sexist. When you see what was being advertised, you'll probably agree. What follows is Not Safe For Work. Unless you work in Germany. Or at Ass Weekly.
The headline translates as: "Actually, we are a serious career forum!" Of course you are. It's a poster for a career expo at the Technical University of Munich. Okay. Searching my mind for a non-sexist reason why a woman's tight, hot ass would be in this...LOOK AT THAT GODDAMN ASS! That thong is doing some serious flossing!
Maybe this perfect ass is a metaphor for the perfect job? Or perhaps they're intimating that women with asses like this one don't date directionless dudes? Or... no, of course it's just baldy simple: a career forum at a technical university is going to draw mostly single men. So to guarantee maximum attendance, they did a casting call of women's asses, picked the best one, shot it, and Photoshopped a tattoo of the forum logo on it. To show at least a nod in the direction of an idea, I would have liked to have seen some rolled-up technical drawings tucked under her arm, or something.
I had a dream last night about this ass. True story! It belonged to an American woman who was playing basketball and had a sweet jump shot.
[This post is dedicated to departing editor Alex Balk, just about the only other person around the Gawker environs uncouth enough to stare, unblinking and slack-jawed, at the above ass.]
[Balk Note: Choire, please double-check the editing on this particular column; for some reason I'm not able to focus properly on the words.]
Previously: How To Get Head In Advertising