Hey, strippers, wanna max out your earnings? Stop taking birth control! That's the conclusion drawn from a recent University of New Mexico study showing that exotic dancers "made about $70 an hour during their peak period of fertility, versus about $35 while menstruating and $50 in between." Pill-popping pole performers, however, averaged almost twenty dollars less than their nonspermicidal-wombed colleagues, which the study suggests is a result of the pill's "hormonal cues indicating early pregnancy." To research this very important subject, psychologist Geoffrey Miller "tapped the talent at local gentlemen's clubs and counted tips made on lap dances," which, to us at least, makes Geoffrey Miller perhaps the greatest psychologist ever. If you can convince someone to shell out grant money so you can spend your afternoons hanging out with Dakota and Stormee at the Titty Trap you are pretty much tops in your (or any) field.