What Do The Stars Hold For Fameball Jakob Lodwick?

If you know your date and location of birth, you can get a customized astrological prediction for free at Astro.com! They're translated from German or some shit, but they seem to otherwise be pretty dead on. For example, here's yesterday's prediction for Vimeo founder Jakob Lodwick, Star Editor at Large Julia Allison's on-again boyfriend, who once let Hampton Style editor Deb Schoeneman put a digit in a secret place inside him:

"Valid during several months: Today you seek excitement and stimulation through your love relationships, even to the point of provoking a fight. The existing patterns of your relationships will become difficult to deal with even if you know that they are basically constructive. Be careful of being impatient with loved ones, demanding that they gratify your need for excitement, unless of course you want to have an argument. On the other hand, this is a good day for getting things out into the open, where the two of you may reach an understanding." Eerie, right?