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Each week, our commenters blab and blab and blab. We used to reward them arbitrarily with a night in our Gold Star Motel. But that was just to get them to shut up. Who will listen to them? Who will care? Not us! But we know who cares: Crazed uber-commenter — and Gawker employee! Oh, the scandal! — LolCait cares!

O hai. U can has funee commentz? Of curse. U has many commentz this week. Is prety gret, aktully. Here. Ur commentz:

  • From CODEPINK in Great Moments In Journalism
    "Being late for work reminds me of every abortion I ever got."
    Actually, really, your work all week. It's been scrumtrulescent.
  • From ELLAGOOD in Hooters Is Filled With Fried Sadness
    "nothing fried ever comes with a side of sadness. ever."
    Just goes to show that you don't need to capitalize to be completely, 100% right.
  • From ELIJAH POLLACK in Julia Allison In The 17th Century
    "I found most of these comments rather pedestrian. Too boring for me!"
  • Is it weird to pick a Commie from last week's Commies? Eh. Fuck it.
  • From DOROTHY MANTOOTH in Pimps Are Recruiting Our Children!
    "See this ring?
    Genuine topaz. My mother's birthstone.
    Know how I paid for it?
    Also, is 'Sheila McClear' another one of Balk's body parts I should know about?"
  • From SHE_OF_THE_SOCKS in You Know What Your House Needs? An Observatory, Duh!
    "I'd like to get an observatory for my home, but it'd clash with my solid gold sex doll, that Britney crowning sculpture I picked up at Galapagos all those months ago and the area rug fashioned from the pubic hair of albino Aborigines. That'd be tacky."
    Hah! And, whee! Two weeks in a row! U has a funee.
  • Okay. That's all. Really, everyone did well this week. Everyone does well every week. Thanks for being nice about who I really am. (Yes, even you BrianVan.) And a special sniffly goodbye to Mr. Alexandra Balk, who will be missed for a few minutes.
  • Happy long weekend! Yay Native Americans! Sort of!