Blogger and author Tionna Tee Smalls is here to help you get your head right. This week she takes on a problem that has nothing to do with romance: getting treated like crap by one's employer! We're all ears. Got a question for Tionna? Ask!

Hey Tionna,

I have a friend that has been working for an organization called [REDACTED]. My friend has been with this company for about 3 years. At this organization she has trained the majority of the employees including myself and worked continuously on [REDACTED's] website, I mean this girl bent over backwards for this company to show her loyalty and I have to say they treated her like shit. There was an assistant supervisor position that was vacant at this company and they bypassed my friend to give it to someone whose spelling and grammar is off and has no people skills at all...I'm not telling you this cuz she is my friend, but other coworkers at this company feels the same way ... not to mention they wanted my friend to continue working on the website with no compensation and continue to help with other employees with no benefits.

Basically they want her to do the other girls job with no compensation, while she sits on her ass looking pretty. I feel bad for her because she is a hard worker and there isn't many people in the world today that is dedicated like she is and self motivated and considerate. Her feelings were crushed when she heard she wasn't getting the promotion that was promised to her from her direct supervisor. This girl deserves better. Tionna what should I tell my friend... she is ready to resign....these mother F***'s has allot of nerve. At this organization if you're not white or Hispanic your A** would not accomplish anything.


Dear Mad Black Woman,
This is totally a problem and I have been there and done that so I can definitely help you out on this one. Before I became the writing extraordinaire/advice diva I am now, I was a customer service/sales representative in a storage company in Long Island City. When I first started the job, I loved it. So I took on more responsibilities than I was asked to perform. At this time I was only making a slim $9 per hour. But honey, I worked it. What made me stay despite the horrible pay and bad hours (12-8pm), was the rapport between my co-workers and I. We had a great relationship. Months passed and my hourly rate increased, I took on more things. I showed them that I knew how to do certain things in the computer. I became their marketing go to girl—overall, their black buck.

Finally I realized that, considering all of my duties, I wasn't being compensated the way I felt I should have been. Here I go doing marketing reports and I'm here at a front desk. Hell, where is my cubicle? After a while, I realized that I could have been doing my boss' job. So I went out and applied for similar positions as hers, and received plenty of offers but based on fear, I turned them down. I finally received the courage to say Tionna Smalls doesn't want to be a manager of a storage facility; she wants to be able to buy a storage facility one day. So I enrolled my ass back in school and a few months later. I resigned. Here is the good part, you ready for this? Before I resigned, I was told that I was going to get paid for some "sick" days that I had taken to go down south to see my Grandmother for Thanksgiving. Once my supervisor found out that I was out, she reneged on that promise.

So when I left after staying for not two weeks but a whole entire month and a half later (so that they had enough time to train the new chick), I received no going away party and my check was tragically eaten out. I was pissed but it showed me something: JOBS TREAT THEIR EMPLOYEES A CERTAIN WAY BECAUSE THEY DON'T NEED YOU.

Yeah, we all want to believe that if we left our place of employment that it will burn up in fire and no work will get done, but we're wrong. Jobs can find an employee that will work your job for even less money and they wouldn't give a hot shit about benefits, etc. What I realized also is that it's up to you whether or not you're going to be taking bad treatment from a job. Sometimes, as bill paying people, we take our jobs wayyyyyyyyy too serious. At the end of my job route, I was stressed. My hair on the side was falling out and I was becoming a raging bitch. I hated all the customers and I just wanted to shoot my co-workers and when you get to that point like any relationship, it's time to be out!

So what I think you and your friend should do in a position like this is take y'all asses on Craigslist,, or, and look for another freaking job. Life is hard enough, who needs to be stressed at work, a place where you're smarter than your boss anyway. I feel sorry that she didn't get the position but hey, tell her to take that in stride and keep it moving because there are other jobs that will appreciate a multi-tasker like herself. But while she is there, she should continue doing the website just to keep the peace and so she won't look like she is being petty because she didn't get the position. If she is all of the things you said she was (hardworking and self motivated) then she will see this. What we all have to remember is JOB stands for JUST OVER BROKE. Please, this is neither one of your careers, so bounce. It's going to be hard because you both have been at the job for a while but hey, you gotta do what you gotta do. I used to be attached to my job too until I realized that what P. Diddy said was true- IT'S ALL ABOUT THE BENJAMINS BABY. Whatever job is paying more and giving you more (benefit wise), then holla at them. It's different for those who are in careers they love because most of us aren't doing it for the money; we do it for the love of what we do...but for people, who just have a job, please...

In closing, I noticed that you said that if you are not White or Hispanic, your ass wouldn't accomplish anything at that work place. That's a huge problem. A problem so huge, you could get pizaid (yes, I said pizaid) on a law suit for that. Make sure that this accusation is correct, get proof, and address it to your higher ups. If nothing is done about this after you bring it forth to the light, then go see Al Sharpton, I think I have his number on speed dial. I hope this made you feel better and would love for you guys to write me an update,

Love Always,

Tionna Tee Smalls

Ask Tionna!