Beowulf Marketing Team Deems Product Perfectly Suited for Public Storage Facility


Should we be surprised that the largest visual Beowulf marketing placement in Tinseltown is a customized gift-wrap of the Public Storage facility squatting at the corner of Santa Monica and Highland? Nay! The well-researched placement is simply Paramount's attempt to sequester a share of the eyeballs normally reserved for Apple's longstanding "We are fucking huge, and we are here to stay" tribute to dancing and antisocial behavior directly across the street.

It is unclear at press time whether the buyers were extended the facility's standard "$1/first month" contract afforded typical lessees. Pointless closeup follows; unfortunately in this case, the zoom further prevents a sidelong glimpse of a massive, Public Storage-prepared, naked, golden, compellingly lifelike Angelina Jolie.

Beowulf Marketing Team Deems Product Perfectly Suited for Public Storage Facility