Hey Alec. Honey, we all know off-the-cuff situations involving recorded audio aren't exactly your forte. We've talked about this in our last meeting, remember? About how you were going to call your publicists before you got that urge to say something moroni—sorry, creative—anywhere near a mic? So what is this I'm hearing about your having called into the locally-beloved WNYC Brian Lehrer Show just now during a quaint little discussion about city streetscapes to trash his tote-bag-toting audience's favorite neighborhood? You couldn't possibly have mentioned, during a live taping, that the Upper West Side is "one of the dirtiest neighborhoods" in the city? That its cachet is marred by "all the mid-priced restaurants" clogging up the place? And you actually let on that you've lived in this dirty mid-priced neighborhood for years? Those liberal literazzi will so hunt you down, bro. If you survive the week, give me a ring and we'll talk about an ironic make-nice SNL appearance. Or maybe a permanent Left Coast relocation. You are so fucked. Lotsa love, Matt Hiltzik & the gang.