The Daily News continues to own the "human interest stories involving Scores strippers" beat (no wonder they're back on top—except for that little matter of how they're carrying so much bulk circ, but whatever!) with today's story of a dancer reunited with her two adorable dogs.
Daisy Rojas' dogs, Charles and Darwin (!), were snatched outside an Upper East Side restaurant and returned two days later by a mysterious man known as "Hector." Hector claimed to have bought the puppies from a homeless man for $200, which he would like back from Rojas. Rojas is declining to pay Hector anything, though she has offered him "a free lap dance."
What a heartwarming Christmas tale! We see Eva Mendes as Daisy, Philip Seymour Hoffman as Hector, and CGI-enhanced Mike Myers and Chris Rock as the dogs.