Oh No, Your Boss Sent You A Facebook Gift!

It's a scenario as disturbing as it is common: Your boss becomes your virtual pal on online social network Facebook. There are defensive tactics you can adopt as soon as you get the initial request. "It's like an unwritten rule that your boss shouldn't add you, or, if he does, than you have the right to slap privacy restrics on his ass," says a young magazine writer who's been "befriended" by several of his superiors. But some employees still wonder how to handle the finer niceties of such a fraught relationship—like, for instance, when your boss sends you a $1 imaginary gift to compensate for a real-world slight or oversight.

"After what was surely my worst week at work ever, which culminated in my boss giving me some bad news about a project I had been involved with—an extra-special Friday afternoon cherry on top of a shitty workweek sundae—I dashed off an email that provided some clarification to her about what had gone wrong with the project. She never replied. Never said anything to me about the email. As in not ever, never. Unless you count the fake box of chocolates on Facebook she sent me the next day," a publishing peon told us.

"Was that supposed to be the response? Is that how life is now? I have a real fucking problem, and I get a fake consolation prize? I guess I should feel lucky she didn't like, give me a Vampire bite or a SuperPoke something." Or, you know, a bar of soap, or handcuffs, or a can of whoop-ass, all of which are also available.

And maybe this lady should feel lucky! After all, there are only 36,205 "boxes of chocolate" left.