Rosie O'Donnell Hates Bush But Loves Women

Last night there was a gala for Rosie O'Donnell's For All Kids Foundation. She told the audience "George Bush is a war criminal," and everybody applauded, even Fox Business Network's Cody Willard who was sitting at a table with Susan Thomases, Hillary's right-hand woman. Joan Rivers was there. So were a ton of gays. Some of them even got in a fight over some Cyndi Lauper tickets. Strangely, we know someone who witnessed these events and sent us this bulleted report.

  • The Post's Cindy Adams didn't show up.
  • During the live auction (there was a live auction) two random gays got into a bidding war over backstage passes/vip tickets to this summer's Cyndi Lauper tour.
  • Two other gay guys got in a bidding war over a 14-day cruise. Rosie was like, "Gay with the crazy hair, gay with the glittery tux is going to take you." They hugged.
  • In the VIP room the passed appetizers were little pigs in a blanket, sushi, and I think I saw some chicken skewers.
  • Joan Rivers, Kelli Carpenter-O'Donnell, Rosie's partner and Kelli's parents were there.
  • Rosie flew in this 78 year old woman who saved the life of a 98 year old woman during Hurricane Katrina and the two women are both named Annie and now they live together.
  • The main courses was bangers, steak and asparagus They were arranged to look like penises and vaginas. [Or so our source's aunt claimed.]
  • Paul Simon performed 7 songs. The last number was 'Diamonds on the Soles of her Shoes.'
  • The event raised more than 1 million dollars.
  • Everyone cried.