9.The Cobrasnake. Fresh Prince of Bel Air photo #4986: "Hi, we're twelve year-old rich kids in Los Angeles. We love Kanye, we're too busy doing whatever we see on television to bother brushing our teeth, and we want to be ridiculed by other people when we grow up."
5. Last Night's Party. VHS SOS photo #4848: Right after moving into the NYU dorm, The Three Urbanoutfiteers decided to celebrate their foray into the world of New York City hipsterdom with their VERY FIRST TATTOO! Aren't they so cute?
4. Last Night's Party.Homeless photo #4381: I love when random nightclub DJ groupie bimbos tack on a couple of wacky ironic accessories and try to pretend they're "indie" or whatever, and weren't just snorting cock of some Rockstar Energy Drink rep at Marquee last week.
3. The Cobrasnake. Churro Juicer photo #8718: Here's a classic specimen for another round of everyone's favorite Blue States Lose game: "Hipster, Homeless, or Alcoholic House Painter?" The paint-stained fingers, slobbering expression of total incoherence, old mesh hat, and flannel shirt suggest one of the latter two options, but what are we to make of the little indie rock pin and crazy indie t-shirt? The answer is he is actually all three: a homeless hipster alcoholic who wanted to be an artist but now just paints houses. Thanks for playing, and until next time!
2. Last Night's Party. BJ Panda Bear video: I don't know if I even need to say this, but you should all be subscribing to Last Night's Party Guy's YouTube Channel. If you didn't think it could get any better than popsicle girl, well just feast your peepers on this piece of cinema, an epic Odyssey-like adventure through an underground hipster party in which our protagonist must survive wasted chicks blowing bubbles and eating marshmallow spread, a horde of photographers' flash-bulbs, and two girls making out on his journey the weird Asian guy all tied up with electrical tape he's been so desperately seeking.
1. Nicky Digital. Ruff Club photo #64555: This is actually one of those hidden 3-D pictures. If you relax your eyes and stare at it long enough, you'll see all the hope and joy you had left in your heart sucked into an infinite existential void, then tortured to death and raped in front of your family.