Hey, sorry! Maybe you didn't see Project Runway yet last night on Bravo. If so, we will put a bunch of words here so this doesn't show up on your RSS feed and spoil your Tivo'd episode. La la la. Okay, SO!
Chris, the delightfully flamboyant and marginally talented costume designer who resembles nothing more than an huger Nathan Lane in La Cage Aux Folles, got kicked off last night because, well, he has the taste of Nathan Lane in La Cage Aux Folles. But it was close!
The contestants had to split into themes and create a collection based on outdated trends that were profiled in Elle. Trends like shoulder pads, zoot suits, dancewear, cut outs, neon, and fringe. Which reminds us, fringe was fucking awesome. Also: bike shorts, slap bracelets, those ghetto Looney Tune t-shirts, Reebok Pumps, Umbros, Hypercolor t-shirts, Bo Knows, Z. Cavaricci's, Pepsi Clear and that weird drink Orbitz. All awesome. But beyond a trip down memory lane (seriously, FRINGE!) last night's episode was a dramatic roller coaster made out of satin and tears.
That piranha-seeming poor gay guy with the mesh hat almost got kicked off, which would have been ideal because he is THE WORST! He can't sew. He has no taste. He whines. He cries. The only thing that saved him was that that cute bitchy and bossy Asian woman defied his vision and made her own outfit even though he was team leader.
Also Donna Karan? She was a judge and she looks HORRIBLE! I mean trashy and off and weird and scary horrible, not like, "ooh, darling, you look HORRIBLE!" horrible. Michael Kors looks orange and also ill. That 21-year-old Gehry-haired dude named Christian is getting reallllly annoying.
But our biggest heartbreak occurred after the show. As we were preparing to write this, we visited Bravo's website (never go there). This is what we saw: Gah! Proj Run's Jack is fucking Top Chef's icky Dale? Fuck! And Jack is so sweet too. Also, maybe he's leaving next episode.