Hmm, boring keynote, let's see... Inked a deal with all the major studios to rent their movies through the iTunes store for $3 - $5, already owning 99% of the paid video download biz. Check. (Oh yeah, new Apple TV software and pricing at $229 means it's $30 more than an 8-gig nano, making it an easy purchase even if you're not 100% sure what you want it for.)
Thinnest laptop ever, extending the iPhone's touch and gestures... the first viable user interface alternative to the mouse to get traction, ever. Check.
iPhone SDK in less than a month... the first handheld with a good programming environment (ever — I'm looking at you Palm, Microsoft and Symbian), with end-to-end e-distribution and https-trustworthy Apple handling the transaction, collecting and paying you your money, every small developer's dream, plus all those people who pissed and moaned that the iPhone is closed and Apple is fascist will shut the hell up. (Hey, I can dream.) It will cause a renaissance in haldheld apps. Check.
Wireless, automated, continuous, invisible, background time machine backups, not with a multi-hundred dollar program and not some POS that slams your disk for an hour every time you backup, just figuring out what to copy, with one-click restore via the very affordable time capsule. (And no it's not the same as volume shadow copy.) Check.
OMG the sky is falling. Apple's lost it. Sell you Mac. Buy Vista... *cackle* "Buy on the rumor, sell on the news." Apple has more vitality in its castoff fingernail clippings than Microsoft can muster, despite their billions.
That fourth selection really does describe me. I find Apple, Microsoft and Hollywood and all their woes very comical. I spit on your grave Hollywood, ptewy!!
Funniest thing about the new notebook: it still has only one mouse button!
Age old Apple rational for one mouse button: Not needed, complicates the interface.
New touchpad selling points: two finger gestures, Three finger gestures. Twirling, pushing, pulling swooshing, geeze I need a reference card to figure out what to do with my thumbs!
Oh the Humanity!