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If you're anything like us, even breaking news on Kiefer's freedom, Oscar noms and the snoozefest that is Sundance still leaves us aching for our guiltiest pleasure: Brit Brit updates! So when we heard Mr. Romulus von Stetzelberger, designer of the hat Britney wore in our all-time favorite shot of her, musing on his 2006 Emmy swag suite run-in with The Animal on Jonesy's Jukebox, we had to dig up more dirt just for old time's sake. To hear the tale behind the hat, including cameos by ex-bff-turned-traitor Alli Sims and Felicity Huffman (!), a classic diva-like performance by our girl, and gruesome details about her struggle to shimmy into a tight velvet jacket while knocked up, read on.

After setting up shop in a hotel swag suite, Romulus of South Paradiso Designs was told by the staff that "Britney will be coming" the next day. But first, he would be visited by Alli:

"This short little brunette comes rushing in and tells me, 'anything you have out you have to give to Britney if she wants it.' So I said no, sorry, I can't do that. It took forever to set it all up. And Alli goes, "well then you have to hide whatever you're not giving away.' She didn't get it. If someone likes something, I'll give them my business card. Celebrities can get shit for free, but somebody like Britney Spears, to me, is just someone who lives in a trailer park, everything I hate about music."

So what happened the next day when the preggers mess arrived?

"She went straight towards my $2,400 hat, the VooDoo Priest Top Hat and just put it on, along with one of my velvet jackets, just posing for all the cameras in there. When I gave her my card and told her she could come in and buy it whenever, she just pouted and tried prancing around the suite to show me how much she liked it. I still said no. She did not look happy. She wanted the jacket too, but it wasn't even close to fitting her, like a 12-inch gap away from fitting her."

Any celebrities who aren't so pouty?

"Felicity Huffman loved this sheepskin jacket and wanted it for Aspen, but didn't for a second think she should get it for free. She said she'd be 'honored to buy it' from me. And Jack White, an actual artist, comes in all the time and pays like a real customer."

You hear from Britney since?

"On all counts, NO. That picture made me sick to my stomach. But you know what? Maybe if she'd offered me 5 grand or something, I might've given it to her."

Oh Brit. Making people, and yourself, sick consistently for years. Keep up the good work!