If there's one double-edged curse/blessing plaguing us all, as a species, it's probably our capability to love too much: An overprotective parent's smothering love of a child. A neglectful husband's love of golf. And then there's that thing going on between Harvey Levin and his sippy-cup. Wherever Harv goes, the smooth black cylinder goes with him, its thin, green, periscopic straw peeking out, waiting to satisfy the TMZ chief tactical engineer's frequent thirsts.

And just what liquid is contained within? We like to imagine it's scalding black coffee, refilled upon the half-hour by a neophyte staffer to ensure it never dips below 175 degrees, and ingested via straw so as to hasten the caffeine-high while avoiding staining expensive bridgework. Then again, if it was just water, it wouldn't render Defamer videologist Molly McAleer's stunningly crafted urban ode to Levin and his cup any less effective, capturing the greatest love between a man and his beverage receptacle the world has ever known. Enjoy. [Lyrics NSFW.]